It is an often repeated word- GENERATION GAP. When we find we are unable to get through to the next generation or decipher their behavior, we rely on this word. It helps to put a whole lot of unexplainable stuff under the gambit of the generation gap. So, what is the generation gap? Have we ever tried to decode it? Will it help in any way if we decode it to bring about better relationships?
The older gap
The generation gap is not necessarily only in the age between the older and the current generation. It is also in thinking, attitude, approach to life, and many other aspects. Most often, it is just that the two sides are just not able to see things in the same way. At times, it is also the ego getting in the way of not wanting to see things from the other’s perspective. Sometimes, it is also a matter of the elder generation not being able to trust the younger ones.
It could also be the inability to let go and allow them to make their mistakes to learn their life lessons. The older generation feels they are old and experienced and have seen more life. The natural conclusion is ‘We know, we have seen and experienced, so we don’t want you to make the same mistakes. Also, there are many things that they are not used to from tattoos, live-ins, and same-sex relationships, to not wanting to take up conventional jobs that can cause minor to serious issues’.
Another issue that can cause rifts is the constant comparison to their times, which the older generation does. Things have changed and many things can not be done as they were earlier. Besides, when the older generation tries to impose their likes and dislikes on the younger ones, or try to make them out to what they could not, etc., issues crop. If the old man wanted to become a doctor, but could not, so expecting his child to become a doctor is one such thing.
Sometimes, a total lack of communication can also cause a generation gap. When people are too busy with their lives, they rarely get time to sit and talk and understand each other. So assumptions and perceptions come into play and create a generation gap. Also, with the advent of technology, Gen Z is more into devices than old people, and Covid forced them to be more so. Everything went online and so did relationships.
One would have thought that when lockdown happened, people got more time with each other and that might have helped. However, an Indian survey says that the Covid times have increased the generation gap. According to this study published in some national newspapers, 75.8% of the elderly thought the generation gap has increased in recent times. One of the many reasons for this was the social distancing in families that were distant from the older generation living separately. They were not teach-savvy either and hence, the communication almost fully broke down.
The younger gap
From the younger side, it could be a simple lack of understanding, patience, etc. They may feel a bit irritated at the older generation trying to curb their freedom, control their life, and so on. They may also expect their parents to show an inclination to be more tech-savvy or at times be more open about things, etc. When all these issues come into the picture, it becomes a generation gap. A gap between the two generations that could easily be bridged with some middle ground.
It is natural that every generation cultivates a certain ethos and prefers to live with it. The current generation is also doing that. With advances on all fronts, it is natural that their thinking is more evolved and open. Whether music or fashion, career or marriage, the younger generation believes that they have the right to make their choices. It is when this is conflicted that the generation gap widens with every decision they make. One only has to look at the example of how society is more open about love marriage to understand how the generation gap bridging is inevitable.
In the end, the best part is that the generation gap is only as much as we allow it to be. So it is in our hands to overcome it.
In my coming blog, I will write about how to bridge this generation gap.
Waiting for your feedback on this blog.
Anil Malik
Mumbai, India
27t February 2024